SIEC ALERT No. 40

Suicide Prevention Doesn't Always Mean Talking About Suicide

What is Resiliency?

Building Self Worth in Children

Summary

Elements of Programs that Foster Resilience

Resiliency on the Web

Suicide Prevention Doesn't Always Mean Talking About Suicide

Suicide prevention shouldn't start when a person is suicidal and intervention is necessary. Ideally, suicide prevention needs to begin far in advance of a crisis situation when a person, preferably a very young person, is taught how to respond to adversity and stress in a manner which will lead to solutions that do not put their life at risk.

There are many approaches that can result in a reduction of suicidal behaviour and the earlier they are initiated the more effective they will be.

What is Resiliency?*

Resiliency is defined as the ability to readily recover and adapt to adversity. A resilient person demonstrates an ability to manage or cope with significant adversity or stress in ways that are both effective at the time, but which also help strengthen them against future adversity. Resilience is born out of the balances between what are known as risk factors and protective factors.

Risk Factors include characteristics or circumstances which may precede lifestyle problems and dysfunction. They include:

• aspects of individual personality and disposition

• psychological and behavioural traits

• environmental factors related to the person's family, peer group, or community

• life events such as normal developmental transitions associated with age and rites of passage, divorce and death

Protective Factors operate both at the individual and environmental levels as well. They include:

• positive personality traits such as a sense of personal value and purpose

• skills such as the ability to communicate and think things through effectively

• environmental supports such as strong and consistent parenting and non-drug using friends

*excerpted from: Callan, L., "Resilience: the Touchstone of Well-Being," in AADAC Developments, 15 (4), June/July 1995.

Building Self-Worth in Children*

"No Parent starts out in the morning planning to make his child miserable. No mother says to herself, "Today I'll yell, nag, humiliate and hurt my child whenever possible." On the contrary. Yet, we often find ourselves doing just that - and doing things we don't mean, in a tone we don't like." Haim Ginott, Child Psychologist

The formation of self-image begins very early in a child and is largely the product of relationships with parents and early caretakers. Whether a child will be confident, self-assured person, or a fearful, guilt-ridden one depends very much on the treatment he or she receives. Several ways parents and other caregivers can influence a child's feelings of self-worth follow:

• Avoid labeling - labeling a child as bad or worthless is self-fulfilling

• Provide unconditional positive regard - generous doses of love, tenderness and acceptance of the child even in the face of undesirable behaviour

• Remember your own experiences - enhance the positive ones and ensure that you do not repeat the negative experiences you faced

• Cheer your child's accomplishments - provide lots of positive verbal feedback, offer attention, approval and appreciation for desirable behaviour

• Be interested and attentive - pay attention to your child and show interest in their activities

• Accept children as individuals - avoid comparisons and competition with siblings and other children, accept the child as an individual in his own right, with his own abilities and limitations

• Help children to be non-prejudiced by teaching concepts such as: all people are individuals worthy of dignity, and are interesting and important. Remind them that human variety is interesting, exciting and essential - expose children to other cultures. Be aware that each child has a right to be what they are - respect and support the right to be different

• Set reasonable limits - set standards of behaviour that are clearly defined and enforce those limits, be reasonable with setting limits and cast a vote of confidence for your child

• Focus on situations and conditions - if things go wrong talk about the situation not the child. Describe what you see, what you feel and what needs to be done. If things go well give recognition to the facts, comment on the accomplishments and the feeling of satisfaction

• Treat the child as a thinking being

• Establish eye contact - getting down to the child's level is important in developing self-esteem

• Do not embarrass children - children's feelings are more easily wounded than an adult's

• Help children acquire skills - image-building skills can begin very early in life

• Birthdays - make birthdays a cause for celebration and build happy memories

Summary

The ability to feel comfortable about yourself - to feel you are a worthwhile person - is an important step in growing up. Before a child can like others, he must first be able to like himself. Because each child is different, they react differently to pressures and expectations put upon them by themselves and by others. In order for all children to "come out winners" parents must identify their children's limits and abilities and slowly teach them to deal with each new stress that comes their way. Teaching them how to cope is the greatest gift parents can give their children. This is suicide prevention in its most effective form.

* Excerpted from: "Building Self-Worth in Children" http://www.gov.mb/agriculture/homeec/cba14s01.html.

Produced by: Manitoba Agriculture, Home Economics Section, 915-401 York Avenue, Winnipeg, MB, R3C 0P8

Elements of Programs That Foster Resilience

1. the development of social problem-solving & decision-making skills in youth

2. contact with caring adults who hold clear & high expectations, convey confidence in youths' ability, emphasize positive feedback & actively search for and develop students' competencies

3. school environments that provide opportunities for and reinforcement of active participation in classroom & school-wide activities

4. school structures that foster the development of relationships between students and adults

5. parent and community involvement with the school

source: Forman, S. G., & Kalafat, J. (1998). Substance abuse & suicide: Promoting resilience against self-destructive behaviour in youth. School Psychology Review. 27. 398-406

Resiliency on the WEB

www.resiliency.com
Includes an overview of the journal Resiliency in Action

www.projectresilience.com
Offers professional training and resources for education, treatment & prevention

www.cyfernet.org
Children, Youth & Families Education & Research Network for individuals & groups interested in families & resiliency

www.gov.ab.ca/aadac/index.html
Includes issues of the periodical Developments. (see: 'Resiliency: A Vision of Hope' volume 18, #7)