Frequently Asked Questions About Grieving the Loss of Your Pet

Death is not an easy issue to cope with, as it is the one truth in all our lives. Losing a loved one can be deeply traumatic, even if it is 'only' a pet. Some people feel unable to face the prospect of getting a new pet if the death of their previous one had a hard emotional impact upon them. Yet there is more to life than death and loss, it is only those factors that provide an end to what can be a joyous celebration of life as you see your pet play with a ball, catch a Frisbee or just curl up on a pile of clothes in the laundry room and peacefully sleep away an afternoon.

Grief is normal, inevitable and will fade in time. Grief is neither a 'punishment' nor a 'price to be paid' for the enjoyment derived from the company of another. It can be a beautiful part of life that makes the positive feelings shine and that tells us that all we experienced before has been glorious.

Is it normal to grieve over the loss of a pet?

It is just as normal to grieve over the loss of a pet as it is to grieve over the loss of a human. Not only is it normal, but it is healthy to grieve. Suppressing grief causes more pain. Tears are an important part of accepting and working through the grief. Remember the funny things they did. The more you remember (no matter how painful it is) the better you will feel. Saying your final "good-bye's", planning and being part of the funeral arrangements is an important part of accepting the loss. By allowing someone else to make all the final plans, YOU are denying the loss and grief will be prolonged. Your pet's final disposition should be known to you and this could help to reduce your pain.

How long is a normal grief period?

There is no "normal" set time for grief. Different people react in different ways. Many times grieving people question their sanity. This is the pain and confusion of grief. Grief should not be hidden. Grieving people should associate with others who understand and are sympathetic. Avoid those that don't understand. Further rejection at this time should be avoided. Don't be ashamed or try to hide your grief. Grief denied is grief retained.

Are there pet grief counseling groups available?

The University of California, Davis has a National Pet Grief Hot Line. Your local IAPC cemetery should be able to direct you to others in your area.

Is there a pet Memorial Day?

The International Association of Pet Cemeteries has designated the Second Sunday in September as National Pet Memorial Day. Most pet cemeteries, IAPC members and nonmembers observe Pet Memorial Day with special ceremonies, open houses and other events.

FAQ courtesy of International Association of Pet Cemeteries